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Catriona Hurley

Shut Up, White Woman!


White woman laughs at a comedy show. Text reads, "Shut up, White Woman! Written by Catriona Hurley."

You walk into your first day at Weldon. Looking around the room, you notice (secretly to your elation) there seem to be more female-identifying students than male. Does this mean that the patriarchy no longer exists?! Certainly not.


Speak like a lawyer, they tell you. Wear business clothes for your moot, they urge you. It’s not as if all the tenants of law school are gender and class-neutral. Where can you go to escape the forced conformity of poorly publicly-funded, aggressively hierarchal, and extremely inaccessible academia, you ask? Check out a stand-up comedy show!


Cut-throat classrooms

Unfortunately, when you go to most of these shows you are inundated with male comedians making jokes about abusing women, as if that deserves applause. Alternatively, they poke fun at unhoused people and imply that living outside is a choice that “some people” are dying to make.


As you watch you may think: “Why?” Why do aggressive, argumentative tactics, and being the loudest, most judgemental person in the room, often garner the most laughs of the night – or win the prize of the coveted A+? Are these people smarter, funnier, and just overall better than me? Depends on whom you ask, I guess. Over and over, society and its microenvironments of law classrooms and weekly comedy shows continue to breed the consuming capitalist ideal of competition. The dreaded curve, just like the limited amount of paid comedy slots, force classmates and comedians to be cut-throat; as a result, those who are deemed average are left feeling subpar and unenthused.


Comedy night collegiality

Perhaps a different approach could benefit more individuals in a more sustainable fashion. There are whiffs of this approach within Weldon and the community of queer comedians and their allies. Collegiality can be found within the caring people (and free food) of Weldon when you need it the most. Featured all-female and non-binary comedy nights can be safe havens from racial jokes that are propelled to be funny thanks to nothing other than white

supremacy-fueled ignorance. Participating in these comedy nights, thanks to your encouraging peers, may even gain you praise from your future recruiters!


After one of the four men interviewing you comments on how attractive you are, the interview continues with excitement around your ability to shut down hecklers and feign confidence. However, would they still support your comedic endeavours if they knew that you talked about your feelings on stage? What about your slow recovery from an eating disorder – or your multiple last-ditch efforts to save a friendship that has been over since February? Can compassion and emotional awareness really breed the confidence that is needed to be a litigator? Here's hoping!


So, why not take stock of how you are doing and what you need, and try to avoid the burnout that stems from the oppression of a system that is one-size-fits-all, so long as the garment covers your white willy*.


*Lots of people with white willies are great people who are not actively the problem, but we all play a role in dismantling the systems through which immutable characteristics allow us to inherit certain privileges. Xoxo gossip gal.

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